Chapter 1

'For the gate is small, and the way is narrow that leads to life,

and few there are that find it.' (Matt. 7:14)

Happiness is the ultimate aim of all human beings, and without the hope of achieving some measure of it, life is devoid of direction and meaning. If not conducive to someone’s eventual happiness in some way, even the highest of ideals, the most espoused of relationships and the noblest of deeds would be a complete waste. Unfortunately, people of countless generations were indoctrinated that unless they are perpetually serious and heavily burdened they are not living good Christian lives. They were instilled with a fear of seeking their own happiness lest they be doomed for their selfishness. These were regrettable misrepresentations of the Christian message. If there is any problem with the quest for happiness, it is not with the fact that we desire it, but how and where we try to achieve it and the depth of happiness for which we are prepared to settle. This chapter focuses on the pursuit of happiness as an underlying theme of Christianity.

The State of Happiness

Because it is very personal, the state of happiness is difficult to define and analyse objectively. Some have described it in vague but intuitively meaningful terms such as ‘when you like yourself and everything that is important to you.' Others summarise it as having health and love, and although this is no less valid, it gives us little useful understanding.

At any given time, a person's conscious awareness is occupied by thoughts that involve memories, imagination or new information, and by complex patterns of sensations, perceptions and feelings. This ‘state of awareness' is the combined outcome of the external ‘realities' and our ‘inner world' that consists of our basic human nature and our learning in its variety of forms that include knowledge, attitudes, habits, beliefs, values, hopes and our deepest inclinations that may be called character. A person is happy to the extent that he likes or enjoys what he is consciously aware of at the moment. The awareness might be explicit and tangible, or subtle and indefinable, and sometimes unhappiness is not so much the result of anything specific that the person dislikes , but rather something that is missing that he may not be able to identify. Clearly, the intensity of happiness (or misery) can lie anywhere between two extremes.

The contribution of our inner world in shaping the conscious experience, helps to explain how it is possible for the feeling of happiness to alter without any change in the more objective realities. It partly accounts for the paradox that one person may be happy in a slum while another can feel desperate in the midst of kindness and luxury. It also supports the notion that our state of mind need not be completely at the mercy of circumstances, as captured in the words, ‘pleasant thoughts make happy people'. Thus we may recognise that our internal state of being is to a significant degree within our own control.

The powerful impact of our present conscious experience provides a strong temptation to try to manipulate it directly through drugs, alcohol, distraction, entertainment, self-talk, rationalisation and a large variety of forms of escapism. Naturally, people prefer to turn off unwelcome states of mind and switch on what is more pleasant, but the overwhelming evidence is that short-cuts work only in the short-term.

Our concern for the future also exerts a considerable influence. Whether the possibilities that we imagine are valid or not, they can evoke very strong feelings, especially if we perceive them to be likely or inevitable. When we face the prospect of something terrible we can be frightened by the thought of it becoming a reality. Likewise, we might be elated with the promise of further delight. For better or worse, our present happiness will tend to be affected by what we believe the future holds in store.

Happiness is dynamic in that conscious awareness is always changing and has the potential to develop and grow. In endeavouring to maintain our comfort zone we may be inclined to take the radical course of ignoring or shutting out the unpleasant realities around us and behaving as if they did not exist. Although this might be conducive to preserving sanity in extreme situations where a person can do nothing about them, as a general habit it undermines the effective pursuit of greater happiness. It suffocates compassion, stifles the ability to extend our limited consciousness and hinders our working towards a more inclusively harmonious reality. Collective human experience has shown that ‘exclusive' positions are never secure in the long term, for the boundaries we create remain perpetually under threat from outside or within. For happiness even to survive, let alone grow, the reality beyond our preferred awareness can never be permanently ignored.

Some Essentials

Whenever happiness is continuing there appear to be three indispensable elements that are always present and in balance: Ongoing Development, Unity and Good Experiences.

Ongoing Development is usually connected with learning, progress, newness, change, building, creativity and growth, accompanied by a sense of direction and purpose connected with hope. In its absence, there is likely to be a state of boredom, stagnation or even decline.

Unity involves oneness, harmony, consistency, peace, integrity, security, completeness, meaning, truth and order. Alienation and fragmentation, on the other hand, are associated with external and internal disunity of a more general kind, and convey a sense of distance and disconnectedness.

Good Experiences are welcome experiences, though sometimes only in hindsight. Normally we expect them to be pleasant and beneficial. They can range from the passive observation of something that appeals to the senses, to total active involvement leading to a sense of accomplishment and satisfaction. They are highly personal and depend on a variety of factors such as sensitivity and readiness.

It is vital that development, unity and good experiences be in harmony with one another, or they can place future happiness in serious jeopardy. For example, certain pathways of development can lead to unforeseen disunity, like the demands of a career promotion resulting in the break-up of a good marriage. Likewise, the consequences of experimenting with addictive drugs provide a warning that not all pleasant experiences are consistent with sustainable growth. Another serious problem is our tendency to over-emphasise one element and neglect the others. For example, some people focus so much on the past or the future that they never enjoy the moment, while others seek instant gratification with hardly a thought to meaning or any form of personal improvement.

The importance of these elements and the need for balance is reinforced by our elders and supported by most of our social institutions. We are taught early in our lives to develop our abilities and fitness, not only to ensure our basic survival, but so that we can benefit from the experiences and opportunities we are likely to encounter. We are encouraged to expand our knowledge and to try to unify what we learn into a meaningful whole. These values form a major part of the reasoning behind education, training and discipline.

Basic Levels of Happiness and the Search for Fulfilment

Happiness is possible at many levels. On the survival plane, development, unity and good experiences, all hinge on the necessities of life - food, shelter, clothing, human contact and freedom from suffering or fear. It is here that happiness is most dependent on material factors, and it is hardly surprising that at this level, happiness is strongly associated with a perception of external security. Regardless of the kind of happiness we eventually achieve, when our basic needs are threatened, our interest tends to return to this level.

Once a comfortable existence seems assured, our attention turns increasingly to other things that we believe will bring us contentment and personal fulfilment. Here, personality and natural ability, together with power, material possessions and favourable conditions are generally regarded as the keys to success. However, our control over these factors is also relatively impermanent, and any happiness that depends on them remains vulnerable. Potentially, they can make a valuable contribution to fulfilment, but only in the light of self knowledge and in support of an attractive and meaningful purpose in life. The words of Christ, ‘Seek and you shall find’ (Matt. 7:7), are particularly relevant in this context as they convey that everyone who actively seeks, finds what he is meant to. We must search with an open mind, recognising that the true purpose of exploring is not to find something specific, but to reveal the hidden realities and possibilities.

Self discovery is a vital part of progress towards fulfilment, and requires a combination of adventurous involvement and quiet reflection. It increases our abilities to identify compatible relationships, recognise beneficial surroundings and get to know the kinds of activities to which we are suited. An awareness of our sensitivities, strengths and limitations, enables us to be more selective in terms of the situations we let ourselves get into, and we become more competent in making decisions that are consistent with our well-being.

Our purpose or ‘mission’ is something that we both find and create. We must seek to broaden our awareness beyond our narrow, superficial, immediate selves and the needs of our own comfort. Combined with a growing self knowledge, this expanding awareness of our surroundings helps us to appreciate the extent of our inter-relatedness and mutual relevance. It is here that we discover our opportunities and find the contribution we can make. We create our own purpose in the sense that we choose the objectives we believe worth pursuing and make a commitment. The results we achieve from useful work and the appreciation we receive from those who benefit completes the cycle of fulfilment. It confirms that our existence is important to more than our limited selves. This desire to be validated, respected and valued by others is a natural characteristic of human beings that encourages cooperation and social unity, and the confirmation that we are well regarded is a major factor contributing to feelings of self worth.

These levels of happiness are important to the continued will to live and the ability to function effectively, and may be vital for personal growth. Nevertheless, intense as they can be, they are not enduring, and they are still not fully satisfying at the deepest levels of one’s being. They extend us beyond our isolated selves, but they do not unite us with the whole of existence. They still do not touch the very essence of life, and with few exceptions, the individual human being left to his own devices appears to be incapable of making substantial progress beyond these levels despite a yearning do so.

Inner Happiness

It is at the deepest and innermost levels that development has the potential to be most permanent, and it is on this foundation that the relatively transient ‘joys of living’ can be accepted without attachment, and more fully appreciated. Enduring inner happiness is not something that can be found, but is the outcome of a building process within human character. To achieve it, we need a willingness to cooperate with a source of wisdom greater than ourselves, and a commitment to put whatever we learn into practice. The most important part is the doing, for without this no words of wisdom will ever become firmly ingrained in us or help to bring about the necessary changes. In the long term, elements of character such as courage, persistence, faith, love and a sense of justice, become far more crucial than circumstances, natural abilities and personality. It is also through the building of character that we become the kinds of people who can safely be entrusted with the power to achieve greater things.

In the course of human history, enough progress was made in this direction, particularly through the philosophers and the founders of some of the earlier great religions such as Hinduism, Buddhism and the prophets of Judaism, to elevate mankind from the cruel law of the jungle to a thin, fragile and imperfect veneer of civilisation that frequently breaks down. Overall, the reality is that happiness, for most people, remains very precarious.

Human Nature

The most far reaching reality of the human condition is our individual and collective ignorance - we do not know enough to guarantee even the most basic levels of happiness. Guesswork and desperation, rather than enlightenment, form the basis of many important decisions, usually with unwelcome results. Our efforts are often counter-productive and create unexpected situations that become severe obstacles to further progress. When we combine this with a multitude of other weaknesses, we have an explanation for much of our frustration. The accumulated knowledge of humanity has seldom prevented society from becoming locked into stagnating or decadent patterns or following misleading pathways of ‘progress’ which end in total disaster. As Christ said, ‘The blind lead the blind, and they fall into the ditch together’ (Matt. 15:14).

Human beings are also prone to being enslaved, not only physically by external powers or the system into which they are born, but psychologically by their own addictions, habits, wants and fears. They trade off what is more important, deeper and more permanent for what is superficially attractive or apparently more urgent. Many sell out their future freedom to buy the present, and by the time they learn, they are often trapped so that every avenue of freeing themselves imposes a greater risk or has a price they are unwilling to pay. At the opposite extreme we find those who can never relish the present moment for they have become completely shackled to chasing some prospect of future material security. People easily get manipulated into indebtedness and dependency, or committing all their vital energies to chasing illusions, false promises and wishful images of themselves. Many fill up their lives with escapism to distract themselves from their deeper persistent problems or the anticipated inevitability of their own demise. Apart from solving little, this also prevents them building a more solid foundation for happiness. Others become caught up in the ‘fast lane’ and cannot get off the accelerating meaningless rush towards premature burnout. Despite its legal abolition, slavery is alive and well; it just keeps changing its form. Even so, it is just another of the major obstacles to happiness.

Much of the knowledge and wisdom of the older generation is ignored, partly because the personal experience on which it is based cannot be transplanted into other people. Children usually reject much of the advice of their elders as irrelevant, and insist on the right to seek their own experiences and make their own mistakes.

Many people go through life believing that they would be happy ‘if only’ a particular problem did not exist. Others assume that happiness will finally be theirs ‘when’ the next goal has been achieved, only to find that the satisfaction is brief and the feeling of emptiness comes back. They might despair or embark on a new theory that keeps them sedated until they reach the same point again. ‘They drink this water, but the thirst soon returns’ (John 4:13).

An ongoing alienation, in which ignorance and human nature play their parts, reveals itself in our relationships with the environment and our fellow human beings, and ultimately, in the conflicts that exist within ourselves. Whether we accept the biblical explanation of its origin or not, our relative disharmony with the rest of the universe is a recognisable fact. Throughout recorded history, mankind has lived in chronic need of internal and external reconciliation, enlightenment, and a sound basis on which real hope can be built.

The Good News

Christ came to give humanity the way to reconciliation at every level, and brought with him the promise of eternal life, namely the assurance of ongoing, increasing, permanent happiness for every person who believes in him and practises what he taught. He offered neither a comfort zone nor a stressful burden, but a means of reorienting our lives to what is of lasting significance. The essential purpose of Christ’s mission was to make it possible for all of us, individually and together, to reach our highest potential and intended destiny. He came to bring hope to the most unhappy, rejected and imperfect of people who feel that life is short, miserable and meaningless, and teach them that troubles are temporary and life is eternal if we let God in. He came to ‘quench our thirst’ with an endless spring inside ourselves. By his life and its outcome he brought God close to people again, and people closer to God. He enabled the kind of happiness that can only come from real hope which stems from believing in something limitless.

The story of Jesus Christ is perhaps justifiably labelled as the greatest story ever told. It could be argued that no single person has ever had a greater and more enduring impact on humanity, and there are few parts of the world that are untouched by his influence. From the Christian perspective, the story of Jesus Christ is the most crucial chapter in the history of God’s love for humanity. This brings us to the subject of ‘God’, but let us first consider the meaning of ‘love’.

The Meaning of Love

The prominence of love in literature, human relationships and every major religion attests to the fact that its relevance to life and happiness cannot be ignored. As important as it is, the concept is nevertheless prone to multiple meanings and usages. In some contexts it has connotations of attraction, attachment and familiarity. In others it implies an intense romantic preoccupation. In parenting it conveys tenderness and care. In psychology it is treated as an emotion, while in philosophy or theology it is often considered an act of will. In some languages there are special words for what are considered to be different kinds of love or ways of loving. In the Scriptures its most usual meaning involves acting in the best interests of a person and striving for a harmonious relationship.

For consistency throughout this book, we shall define love as the pursuit of a person’s happiness and we can qualify this by adding, ‘intended, enlightened and responsible’. It is an attitude or orientation towards that person. This definition is also consistent with the most important and common Biblical usage. Without a genuine concern for the person’s happiness, the words ‘I love you’ contain little more than attachment or appreciation.

Love may have strong feelings associated with it, but in the Christian sense, it is more a decision. A loving orientation usually generates special behaviour such as patience, kindness and gentleness, and these are only a few of its visible attributes. Love can be endlessly deliberated and clarified, but as a concept, it is both extremely simple and infinitely profound. Its power is incalculable, and its place in Christianity is of utmost importance.

"Journey of Insight: an Invitation to Christianity"
©Carl Jacob

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